Writing
my Solutions
Writing is and will forever be a tedious but necessary
skill for me. Even though I can't say that writing is the absolute most
important skill in the world, and it has changed my life forever. One thing
that I can and will say is that I do have a few experiences where I look at writing
and share some good memories with this old friend.
My experience started for me during my senior year when I
started spending time with different people and getting closer to old friends.
Among my new group, I had a friend who we will call Alexis; I had known her
since my freshman year when I met her in Chemistry class. I always considered
her to be interesting and funny, but I also thought she didn't like me. Well
now that she was in my new group of friends, we started to talk quite a bit
more and I also had a few classes with her so it did make it easier to get to
know her a bit more.
That friendship for me slowly started turning into
something a little bit more: I started to want to talk to her all the time, she
was always on my mind, and after a while I found myself always telling people
funny moments that her and I had together. Clearly, I wanted it to ask her out,
but just like most guys out there, I was afraid, afraid of the answer, or
better yet afraid of rejection. I continued to talk to her and I enjoyed all
the time I was able to spend with her even if it was as friends because she was
the type of person who would make you smile even if you didn't want to.
Sure enough this continued on for quite a few months to a
point where I wanted to start spending time alone with her so that I could get
the chance to tell her how I really
felt; however, she was also a really smart outgoing person who was involved in
advanced placement courses, clubs, and had lots of other friends that she was
really close to so, usually whenever I was free, she wasn't. Unfortunately, she
started to get really close to one of my friends and I lost my chance, which
sent me into thinking about questions like, "now what?".
I didn't really know how to move on since I was really
bad at the whole relationship area, until one day in English, we were assigned
a prompt that required us to come up with a story where the protagonist has an
epiphany about literally anything at all. Just like most writing prompts in my
English class, they were extremely open ended without very many restrictions,
so I always had to think about the
prompts for a few hours before I could ever come up with what I was going to
write about, and on top of the fact, I had the "Alexis situation"
constantly on my mind too. Ironically, I had an epiphany about writing my story
and connecting it back to her, not writing it directly about her, but so that
it reflected how I personally felt at the time.
I wrote my story and sure enough, my teacher decided that
this would be one of the assignments we would be able to read in front of the
class. I decided that maybe it would help with me feeling better and so I did.
Of course because my story reflected my feelings so closely and Alexis was also
in my English class, she knew that I had written it about her. She came up to
me after class and told me that she really loved my story and asked if I could
give her a copy of it. From that moment on, we were friends and we still are.
I would say that the story I wrote that day finally made
me realize how I felt and although it didn't dramatically change my life, it
was a big step for me to let her go and find myself again. It was the
opportunity for me to finally take the time and find the words I had been
looking for to describe how I actually felt about my circumstance because when
it comes to writing, I can't just continue to neglect what I need to say; words
actually have to come out and on to the paper, and you can't write an essay by
constantly repeating, "I don't know". But maybe it also helped me in
the sense that I wanted to reflect myself as someone different with hope and
optimism for the future, so instead of the character in the story reflecting
me, it was reflecting who I wanted to be and how I wanted to treat the
situation. Just like the character of my story, I decided to not think on what
could've been, but instead to enjoy what was and what is because I knew I still
had her as a friend; although it didn't end the way I would've liked, I looked
back at the time I spent with her and would , to this day, have it no other
way. After all, there are good days and great days.
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